Its Friday, I ain't got no job (but I do) I ain't got shit to do (but I do)

OK people, another successful week in Miami. Gotta love it.

RA Sushi has opened in South Miami. It sucks, don't go. Just kidding, its awesome, go. But don't tell the rif raf. We don't want any chongas, papi chulos, and daisy duke wearin white trash to invade. Ladies beware: if a guy pulls out a condom that comes in a matchbook cover and reads "its more fun in the RA" stay away. That condom is very small and it means he's cheap. That is no fun.

Recap

• you want a cigarette...you better be coming home with me


• you always gotta look good on a bad day
• Are you coming to dinner tonight?
• Do you like me because I like you?
• Alas, I tried the lobster roll

Serendipity

Lucky Mutt For those of you who have dogs from the street (like me) and would like to retain their ghetto fabulousness, listen up. Snoop dog has redirected his efforts from smokin blunts to making dog toys. Yes, our very favorite lanky, corn row totin, compton gansta of rap has now branded his name to dogg toys. You can choose from boom box (see above), headphones, doberman, canvas sneaker with fat laces and a football. And the best part...the boom box plays a song. You know you know it: bow wow wow yippie yo yippie yah. I mean what more can a mutt ask for? Corn rows perhaps?

PS Google reports the top 4 key word searches in Miami are: Fidel, Cuba, kosher and sunblock. hhhmmmmm perhaps they should be: breast implants, the walk of shame, the south beach diet and heat. Gainesville's top words: pot, organic. Sounds about right. Tallahassee's top words: football (yeah right, not last year) and suicide. Sounds about right.

Key Largo Food and Wine Festival
As if the keys dwellers needed another excuse to drink, they have created their own wine festival. I mean honestly, the keys and the airport is the only socially acceptable place to drink at 9am. Events are from August 1-9th and run all day at various locations. Not sure if they plan to have a drunk shuttle to haul those with "keys disease" around the island. If anyone is interested in going, please sign up at http://www.iamacrazydrunk.com/

http://www.fkrm.com/foodandwine/

Area chefs will be battling it out for the Iron Fork Award. I guess thats like the Oscars for chefs. Anyways, while they battle we get to enjoy samples of food for 20 area restaurants and enjoying an open bar. The event is on September 10th from 6-10pm and only $20. Location: TBA