As if TV couldn't get any worse. I mean, honestly, its like an insult to our intelligence at this point. Back from the old school, Beverly Hills High School that is. 9 0 two dumb hoes has reunited and is creating a new series. So whether you wanted to be popular like Kelly, a bitchy slut like Brenda, mofugly with a fucked up boob job like Dona, wanna be James Dean like Dylan, creater of the spike your bangs like Brandon, or just stupid like David, now is your chance. Because they are bringin it back! So I am sure they will have all the normal high school problems that those poor inner city kids from Compton have but they will do it with style. No doubt, there will be BMWs, Gucci's, Juicy, Ed Hardy, heart ache, and heart break. But we are in a new era now, so its gonna be all about drugs, anorexia, suicide, pregnancy and all that good stuff that faces teens everyday. Yup can't wait. I will be over here...on the edge of my seat.

To Do

The Uppereast Side Garden, a very intriguing little spot in the upper east side, is having a fabulous event on Saturday night. Its dinner and show, but it appears there will be food, music and putt putt! Break out your clubs cuz there's a giant clown head with your name on it. Ten bucks gets you free Grolsch and martini's!! 7244 Biscayne Blvd.

Shout Out

A very Happy Birthday to our favorite person, Miss Peyton Decker. She is always there when you need her, she manages the Kendall location of the freeloader hotel, she picks you up when you are down, she picks you up when you run out of gas, she is the most popular person in Dade County. She is the quarterback of our team, the ying that is our yang, the ebony that is our ivory, the peanut butter that is our jelly.
That being said....

Things not to do

Enter yourself in a dance contest knowing that your friends have cameras and cell phones with video. You will never live it down.

Remember people, no one is safe from the blog.

Recap

• Its gonna take more than a cheesy photo op to get the tall bitches out of their seat
• Yeah, this bag is from high school...T, you're not going to find your virginity in there.
• With music like this I gotta do the two step, but now and then I do the jacket flare

Casa Abreu

Even though Miami Spice is fully under way, the Restaurant at Casa Abreu is also serving up some specialties. The chef, Eddie, his fiance (my BF) Melissa, and his cool daughters, Katy and Yedesi, love to entertain. On a recent visit to the restaurant, kabobs were on the menu, along with some other surprises. The chef likes to start off with "wow" type appetizers. This time it was ceviche, one shrimp and one fish marinating in a tangy, spicy sauce with habanero peppers for an extra kick. The chef also served an appetizer of lightly grilled ham wrapped around a piece of toasted pineapple. It was a perfect blend of sweet and salty. Three types of kabobs were skewered, beef, chicken and sausage. The kabobs were separted by marinated vegetables and cooked up to perfection. The chef also likes to wow guests with interesting libations. On one occassion they served up a blend of amarreto and vodka topped with toasted coconut shavings. Beware: the chef enjoys "night caps" and often talks his guests in having a few. If you are a lightweight, don't do it. This is not a location of the Freeloader Hotel. The nearest location is in South Kendall but if you run out of gas along the way, the manager may come pick you up, 305.986.6582. Another time, chef and fiance cut down coconuts from their backyard and made pina coladas and froze the drink inside the coconut. It was served from the freezer with an umbrella and straw. We hear fiance has a coconut bra but we think only chef gets to see it. Casa Abreu is more than a restaurant, it is an entertainment complex. One a recent visit, fiance broke out an easy bake oven (thats right, old school) and we re-learned how to hula hoop. There are several games to choose from and last night, we even went on a field trip. Party City to be exact. You see, chef, fiance, cool daughters and myself are planning the next full moon party. We (the inner circle) planned the details of the menu, the amazing decorations and cocktails. If you would like to be part of the inner circle, and believe me you want to, you will have to bring 2 bottles of wine (we like beaujolais) and a "wow" type dish. Put away your cheap ass chips and salsa, the chef is from Mexico and this will offend him. He wants something exciting, something that makes him go...wow. This will allow you membership to the inner circle and perhaps even an invite to Casa Abreu for a carnival day.

The Spice is On!

Yes, its finally here. Miami Spice months. Last night we tried Prime Blue Grille in Downtown and all we have to say is that it was our culinary dream come true. As you recall, they were having their endless pour of featured wines to celebrate their one year anniversary. Which in miami years is like a century and a real reason to celebrate. Well, our very delightful waiter took us on a tour de wine, beginning with rose and ending with a dessert wine. (PS people, rose is not white zinfandel, I mean you don't see daisy dukes and country fried steak around do you?) This guy was serious too, he would get mad when the other wine pour people would come around and mess up his rotation. The wines got more full bodied as our bodies got more full. Their spice menu was fantastic and included fish, pasta and two steaks. Delightful waiter informed us that they change the spice menu often throughout the two months so new surprises are in store. The restaurant is beautiful and has indoor and outdoor seating with a hip hop happening bar. Don't think that you are cool enough to roll in without reservations, you know who you are Josh. It ain't Denny's. You will have to wait all leaned up on a pole starving your ass off. BTW, the lobster bisque has actual pieces of lobster, 8 pieces to be exact but word on the street is that you gotta get there early, the bitches be ordering it and it runs out. If they ever have this endless pours night again, we will let you know.

Across the street is an outdoor happening restaurant as well, Manny's. They have a champagne bottle the size of my car inside and the manager was super cool even though he was doing shots of wine. WTF? We will be revisiting soon, investigating and reporting back.

Put your bulletproof vests on, round up your homies and your AK 47 and head down to Bayfront Park tonight to catch some old skool rap. That's right, Nas, Tribe, Mos Def, Method Man, and my favs the pharcyde and what? De La 'Mo Fo' Soul in the house. You risk your life by going. If you have nothing to live for go. Personally, I wouldn't even drive on the highway near Bayfront tonight....stray bullets.

Recap

• The crypt keeper keeps stealing our glasses
• I asked for my steak well done, do I have to say charbroiled?
• Oh my god, you are in danger, do you need a donation?
• I'm the one who didn't drink in school, and I am the one who has a baby
• Keys disease, dont bring it back
• Your neck look ostrichy
• I stole these matches. You don't have to steal them, they give them away

Just in Time for Football Season!!!

You knew it was only a matter of time before my little slice of heaven made it on the blog. This is her new outfit. A picture can't quite capture its cuteness. Now we need to find a sports bar that allows dogs. Your suggestions are welcomed.